I once knew a man that some would say was "too devoted" to his wife. I could imagine other people saying that a man could never be "too devoted" since husbands are supposed to love their wives like Christ loved the Church. That is true, but even there we must make a qualification. Does Christ love the Church more than He loves His Heavenly Father? No. So, then, there is a necessary balance in this love. In the same way, the gentleman I am referring to showed signs of loving his wife, more than he loved the Lord; never a good thing. We all admit that we need to be devoted to certain things, but that means that our devotion must be properly balanced.
It is good to be devoted to your job, but not to the neglect of your family. It is good to be devoted to helping the poor, but not to the exclusion of devotion to Christ. In other words, there is a right level of devotion to anything. Obviously this implies that there is also a wrong level of devotion (which is not always "too little" devotion, but can also be "too much"). Priorities is the real issue here. Since, as Catholics, our Lord takes priority over everything, that should guide us in how we deal with everything else in life. One thing that this includes that not many are aware of is your devotion to your parish.
What does devotion to your parish look like? Some things would be obvious. A person who is devoted to their own parish will do their best to attend Mass there (rather than somewhere else), they will support their parish with both finances and efforts, and they will work to build relationships with other parishioners. For each of these areas, one can be "over devoted" or "under devoted". When someone is "under devoted" that is quite obvious to even the most casual observer. So then, what does "over devoted" look like?
If a person is "over devoted" he will think of his home parish as though it could never do anything wrong and presume that every action and decision at that parish will always be in full accord with what he himself wants. The surprising factor in this whole issue is that both "under devoted" and "over devoted" people will be quick to leave a parish and go elsewhere. The "under devoted" has little to no commitment so he easily just wanders off. The "over devoted", however, leaves for a different reason.
While the "under devoted" person presumes too little about his parish, the "over devoted" person presumes too much. The "over devoted" person somehow acquires an idealistic perspective that can look, on the surface, to be a balanced devotion. These people will usually engage in all three of the habits of devoted parishioners that I listed above, and they will usually seem to be very joyful in their commitment. At least until they start to doubt that everything is as perfect as they thought. Then their commitment begins to diminish because the "rose colored glasses have come off".
I certainly could not presume to know anyone's heart perfectly, but I have known various people whose devotion was unbalanced, and the pattern is almost always the same for how they behave. The most troubling thing about those who are "over devoted" is that when they realize that their parish (or often, the parish priest) is not in perfect agreement with them, they will usually become the most negative and harsh parishioners in the parish. Some will even follow the protestant way and leave the parish because their misguided expectations are not met.
Think about that last sentence for a minute. It is certainly possible that someone might make a mistake about the character of a parish. If you think a parish is fairly traditional, and it turns out they use "pop music" for the Mass, then it would appear you made a mistake. Other than those types of things, what do you "think a parish might be"? Every Catholic parish should "be" what it is supposed to be: a place on Earth where the Sacraments are made available to the faithful, and the historic faith of the Church is taught without compromise. If those are not the case, then it would be right to say "this is not what I thought". If you make more presumptions than that, then you may very well have been "over devoted" to something that you thought about the parish.
If anyone expects to find a parish where the people, or the priest, are always in agreement with them, then they do not genuinely understand the world we live in. Disagreements arise in many places. When a married couple disagrees about something, they are supposed to work it out, not divorce. Areas of disagreement are not something to avoid; in fact, God sometimes allows disagreements to rise up precisely to test us and see if we will work them out like mature Catholics. This is one of the reasons why I am a strong advocate of permanent assignments for priests -- it forces people to work out their problems rather than just wait until the priest leaves. Those who assume, or at least look for, perfect agreement in a parish are always the quickest to demonize any and all who have a different perspective. This is the very opposite of the mature response which says "we need to do the hard work to resolve this".
Those who take a balanced perspective and know that we will not always agree on the non-essentials, are able to deal with things as they arise and move past them with joy and grace. This is because they realize that unless it is a definable sin (either Church law, or God's law) then we must "let it go" (Romans 14:1-12). They are the ones who behave humbly towards others because they know that all Catholics are sinners on the road to Heaven. They practice humility and charity in all things (like St. Augustine insisted upon when there are non-essential issues over which people disagree). They also find it easier to accept differences because they give everyone the benefit of the doubt about their actions and motives. I sit and hear confessions every week, and I still do not presume that I understand why people do what they do.
So then, what does your devotion to your parish look like? Is it "under devoted"? Then realize the danger you are in. Is it "over devoted"? Then you must realize the greater danger you are in. Is it balanced? Then do not become haughty, but seek to maintain humility in all things and ask the Lord to help you to stand fast for the good of other parishioners. Wherever you are, the Church is God's means to teach us how to serve Him, and if we are not devoted to the Church, and especially our own home parish, then our devotion to the Lord is in danger as well.
